What's The Deal With All These Lists?

For the past few years, I've noticed several networks, especially all the music and entertainment channels, running programs counting down something. You could call this debacle "When Kasey Kassem Goes Bad."

Sure, it was somewhat amusing at first. We got to see William Shatner count down the top 100 one hit wonders. Some other network informed us of the top most-shocking moments in rock and roll. But any more, these lists are getting ridiculous... and I should know something about lists. I spent a good part of the 90's writing David Letterman-style top ten lists for the Peoria Jaycees newsletters.

The latest countdown I've seen was the Top 40 Softlicious Soft Rock Songs of All Time. I don't remember what network brought us this informative program. It listed things like America's "Horse With No Name," 10cc's "I'm Not in Love," and REO's "Can't Fight This Feeling." Many of the songs were from the 1970's. I could only stomach about 30 minutes of this crap until I had to turn it off.

And another question, who are the judges who decides on this shit?

Anyway, it's been a while since I composed a top ten list, but here we go:

Top Ten New Countdown Shows For '08

10. Top 70 Oddest Celebrity Baby Names
9. Top 20 Lindsey Lohan's Fave Things About Rehab
8. Top 60 Wildest Hillary Rodham Clinton Pant Suits
7. Top 100 All Time Greatest Spam E-Mail Messages
6. Top 33 Lame Reality Series
5. Top 12 Really Bad Hair Bands
4. Top 5 OJ's Other Crimes
3. Top 30 Lead Filled Toys From China
2. Top 20 George Bush-isms
... and the number one New Countdown Show for '08...
1. Top 69 Sex Positions