President To Stay Overnight

Peoria, IL (RLO News Service) - President George Bush will be staying overnight in Central Illinois after flight crews had difficulties with Air Force One. Bush was in town to spearhead a fundraiser for Aaron Schock, who is running as the Republican candidate for the 18th Congressional District.

Bush had originally asked Schock if he could just "flop on his couch for the night." Schock claimed that his house was already full of family guests and that there was no room to spare. "If I still had one of my rental houses near Bradley University, it would have been perfect for the President," Schock testified.

Instead, Schock summoned his assistants to secure lodging facilities for the President. Within the hour, President Bush and the First Lady were booked for the night at the Ragon Motel in Creve Coeur, IL.

"I am truly honored to stay at a motel that bears the name of my favorite president and role model, Ronald Reagan," stated Bush as he entered the room. No one informed the President that the spelling of the name was different.

As the Bushs' entered the room, the President's eyes lit up and he exclaimed, "Hot Damn! Look honey, they got the magic fingers bed." Bush handed one the Secret Service agents a $10 bill and ask if he could go get change.

As the evening drew to a close, Secret Service reported that the Bushs' ordered a pay-per-view movie, Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay, and were settled in and comfortable.

Parody - Not To Be Taken Seriously